It's Not Better There

I’ve also been reflecting on things I have really wanted in the past:

• to be a certain weight
• to meet a beautiful British man (wink!)
• to get married
• to get pregnant
• to buy a house

And I have spent some time reflecting on WHY I wanted these things. 

You know what I came up with?

I believed it would be better there. 

It would be better when I had my own house, when I could get pregnant, when I could lose the weight. 

It would be better when I got the job, signed a client, paid off my debt. 

I always wanted because I thought I would feel better and IT would be better when I had the thing. 

But one of the most amazing things I have learned from my Life Coach is this:

It’s not better there. 

It’s not better when my debt is paid off. 

It’s not better when I am a certain weight. 

And it’s definitely not better when I get pregnant. 

You see, the reason we ever WANT or DON’T WANT something is because of how we think we will feel when we have or don’t have the something. 

We think we will feel happier, more confident, empowered when we get ‘there’.

We think we will be good enough, strong enough, & beautiful enough too. 

But when we know that we can have ALL the feelings we desire right now, because we know that our feelings come from our thoughts, we have hit the jackpot. 

Feelings don’t come from our achievements. Or getting our wants.

They come from our thoughts. Always. 

Now, we can still want the things for the pure fact of wanting them. But not because it will be better there. Because it doesn’t work like that. 

It’s never better there. When you get there you are still a human, with a brain, living a 50/50 life. 

But the best part is, once we realize that it’s not better there and our current life is exactly as it’s supposed to be right now - which we get to decide is amazing -  then we can fully enjoy the journey to achieving the things we want because we know it’s not the outcome that makes the difference. It’s the process. 

When we can enjoy the process while loving exactly who we are, where we are, doing what we are, and believing this is exactly what our lives are supposed to look like right now, it’s not only THE way to achieve our goals but it’s certainly way more fun.  

So go on, make a list of all the things you want - all of them! 

• Lose the weight
• Be your own boss
• Find love
• Make more money
• Buy a bigger house
• Find a hunky British partner

And start taking action towards achieving these things knowing that it won’t be better there. It’s amazing RIGHT now. And you are amazing right now. And see the difference it makes in your journey. 

xo

What do I want?

Somewhere along the way I was taught not to want. To be grateful for what I have. Wanting seemed greedy and selfish. Having that belief left me not setting big goals for myself or reaching high up in the sky for things I really wanted for no other reason than to just really want them. 

I now believe it’s not only OKAY to want things, but it’s important to want. 

I want to evolve into the best version of myself possible. 

I want to earn enough money to send my children to the best schools. 

I want to have the best relationships with all the people in my life.

I want to have a house that has a pool and a chef and a cleaner. 

I want to be able to take my family on trips flying first class. 

I want to love myself unconditionally for the rest of my life. 

Having these thoughts and writing them down on paper is super exciting. Making huge goals and then taking action to achieve them is also exciting, and also terrifying.